Happy When I Left

As the weekend ended I realized there is really no chance a relationship could developed. So I gave up the excitement for a new relationship with one I could care for and love and make happy and cuddle with for the rest of my life and the euphoria quickly faded.  Maybe under different circumstances and maybe in a different time it could have developed. But, she seems enamored with this other guy who is available for her as he lives closer to her, and is buffed and strong with a six pack. And, I don’t want to disrupt that as it has for her the possibility of a long lasting relationship and some happiness for her.

Reminds me of this song. Elton John’s “Love Her Like Me” from his Songs From the West Coast album.

I would apply that song to another girl I knew from college, who I was enamored with but tidal forces kept her away even though I was the best man at her wedding.

Life can be cruel at times.

And so, the euphoria from last week is now gone. Although I kept the calories in check and only limited the beer calories to two bottles of Three Floyds Gumball Head with the euphoria faded the neutrality back into play I am once again wondering why.

But, in an effort to reduce weight and body fat and to get back in shape, I will continue to keep the calories in check, returning to the consumption of Slimfast and salads.

The Gumball Head gave me a head and stomach ache, too.

On another note, I had to shop for new clothes for a fathers day cookout. Going to my little brother’s estate (yes, it is an estate) is a trauma for me as it displays the economic and social separation between us.

I would say it is a gulf, a deep canyon of rock carved by years of parent devotion poured on him and indifferent tolerance toward me.

So, not having the having the right clothes to attend a fathers day cook out in a multi million dollar estate, I stopped at Kohl’s to shop for a simple polo shirt and a pair of shorts. Thankfully, I found a shirt and a pair of shorts.

Although, the shorts were a 38 and the shirt an extra large, I accepted my expanded girth and paid the dollars so I could at least be presentable at the brothers estate, knowing that it would be tolerated in quiet indifference.

A few hours later I was happy when I left the estate in my new clothes while Elton John’s “The Emperor’s New Clothes” hummed in my head.

Somewhere in western Kansas. June 2015.

Somewhere in western Kansas. June 2015.

 

 

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